May is Mental Health Awareness Month—a cause close to my heart.
- Tabatha Kliemann
- May 1
- 3 min read
Growing up, I always sensed something was a bit off. I was moody, experiencing constant emotional swings. I wasn’t as happy
as I wanted to be, even though I knew I had reasons to feel content.
In my early 20s, I began discussing these feelings with my doctor. However, I felt embarrassed and ashamed. Mental health carried a significant stigma, and open conversations about it were rare. The wealth of information available today wasn’t as accessible back then. I felt isolated, believing no one would understand.
Depression and Anxiety often tried to cripple me, making it a struggle to get out of bed some days. Social events were daunting unless I had a few drinks to ease the tension. Despite having many reasons to be happy, I just wasn’t. I started on antidepressants and anxiety medications.
Over the next decade, I experimented with different medications. I’d go off them when I felt better, only to realize that wasn’t the best decision. Each time I tried to “see how I’d do” without them, it didn’t end well. In my 30s, as mental health discussions became more mainstream, I began to accept that it’s okay to be on medication. It’s okay to talk about mental health and the struggles that come with it. I also knew, my sons and husband deserved a mother and wife that could be present and genuinely happy. I also knew, I deserved better!!
I finally got to where, most of the year, I managed okay. The struggles were always present, and some days required all my strength to get through. But overall, I was functioning. But then winter would arrive and my seasonal depression hit hard. The last few months of the year were particularly challenging, which was frustrating because I love winter and the holidays. I just wanted to enjoy them.
When I was diagnosed with cancer at 36—that was a significant blow to my mental health. I didn’t know what to do or where to start to keep my progress from going backwards. How does one navigate cancer while already dealing with depression and anxiety? I panicked, unsure of how I’d handle everything, but I made one decision quickly, I’m staying on my medications and adjusting them as needed!
Surprisingly, cancer ended up improving my mental health. Not immediately, of course. Initially, I felt overwhelmed. But as time passed, I began to see the world differently. I noticed more details, more beauty. The little things that used to bother me seemed insignificant. For that, I’m thankful.
Despite this shift, winters remained difficult. While my anxiety was under control and depression was manageable, the seasonal lows persisted. I decided to talk to my doctor again—something that has become much easier for me. Together, we explored the possibility of ADHD. I started medication for it in August.
That first winter, I braced myself for the usual breakdown, the depression, the anxiety. But it never came. I made it through winter happily. It felt incredible. I began researching ADHD and was amazed at how much I learned about myself. So many things started to make sense, and everything became clearer than ever before.
I still battle my mind daily, but now I know that’s okay. It’s entirely acceptable not to be okay. Everyone faces their own battles. Mental health shouldn’t carry a stigma; it should be something we discuss openly, at least with our doctors and loved ones. It’s okay to have the feelings you do, but if you want to feel better, there are options available. It might take some trial and error, but with persistence, there’s light at the end of the tunnel.
Beyond medication, staying active and working out have been crucial for me. They go hand in hand with my mental well-being. Perhaps for you, it’s reading or music—both of which also help me. Try to find beauty in the little things around you. The more you focus on them, the more your mindset shifts.
If something feels off and you want to feel better, reach out—to your doctor, your counselor, your family, your friends. Someone will understand, and perhaps you can support each other. A better life is out there for you.
If you’re interested in learning more about mental health, ADHD, or seasonal affective disorder, here are some reputable sources:
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